Good greetings everyone. I hope all of you wonderful people are doing great today. I want to share a few things here and if there's anything that's not allowed to be shared here then I would have no issue at all if this post doesn't get approved as I respect everyone. So, I have been suffering from OCD for quite some time and I have noticed that my contamination theme has improved drastically as compared to the last year when I had to get so many treatments for it. Even still, I find myself getting restricted because of it and there are some times when I have so much trouble in finding freedom from these compulsions. With so many triggers present here and there, it gets really frustrating as I have to force myself to get the job done and I'm not sure if that is the right way to deal with it. I have quit getting reassurances regarding my contamination OCD so everything I do, I do it myself but that does make things hard as well sometimes. 

I've got some family issues as well so it gets really hard to live with people who don't even care to understand what I even go through and what kind of compromises I have to make for their own comfort. It is very hard sometimes to live near people who have traumatised me. I don't even know how long I can even take this anymore. I tried to think about getting hopeful again with my family but I quickly realised that it would never be worth it to even trust them again. I've tried to trust my family and friends so many times only for things to get worse for me everytime. I can't trust anyone honestly. 

I might've mentioned this in some of my previous posts as well but I would like to make this honest and genuine request again. I know this is a support group and I would never wish to go against its rules. I hope I'm allowed to share this request. I actually wish to make some friends with people who really understand OCD and who are compassionate, honest, genuine, not doubting me, not judging me, trustworthy, serious but not too much, very philosophical. I guess I went a bit overboard with all that but I just wish to talk more to more people like these. I've met so many awesome people from these groups and I'm Blessed to have them with me on this journey. I would really appreciate if more caring and understanding and highly intellectual and insightful people would connect with me so that I could enjoy their company and not feel lonely all the time. This loneliness and isolation drives me crazy and there are a lot of groups on Facebook but I just don't feel comfortable making this request in them as they're very vulgar and I really hate vulgarity so that's why these are the groups where I'm comfortable to share things like these. I hope I'm not going against the group rules like this. I hope and pray everything gets better for everyone. Please take care everyone.